You have a near-constant headache from clenching your jaw, your shoulders and your ears are now neighbors from tension, you can’t sleep, and that deadline or difficult conversation still hangs over your head.
You’re stressed out.
Kamille Aiello is a counselor and clinical care manager at UVA’s Department of Student Health and Wellness. (Contributed photo)
Stress can take a physical toll on the body, leading to fatigue, muscle pain, trouble sleeping, and even a weakened immune system, according to the Mayo Clinic. Over time, chronic stress can lead to cardiovascular disease, weight gain and memory issues, and the problems can compound.
You don’t have to grin and bear it, however. UVA Today talked to Kamille Aiello, a counselor and clinical care manager at the University of Virginia’s Department of Student Health and Wellness.
What exactly is stress?
“Stress comes in multiple forms and fashions,” said Aiello, who also pilots UVA’s therapy dog program. “The two that we think of most often are eustress and distress.”
Eustress is “good stress,” Aiello said. It encourages you to prepare for a job interview, study for an exam or clean up your apartment before family comes to visit. Distress is “bad stress.” It can make you feel numb, overwhelmed or helpless to change your situation.
So, how can you handle stress?
Take stock of yourself
Aiello recommends paying attention to what is happening in your body during moments of high stress. You might feel your heartbeat accelerating, your palms sweating, your muscles tensing up, or your jaw clenching, for example.
Paying attention requires you to slow down, which can be helpful in itself. It also allows you to reflect on the sources of your stress. Do your teammates need something from you by 5 p.m.? Are you in a fight with a friend?
“It helps you reflect on what you need in that moment, and figure out which arena of your life is screaming at you the loudest,” Aiello said.
From there, it may become easier to prioritize or accomplish what’s in front of you.
Go back to the basics
The basics still matter – sleep, eat well and exercise. Those habits tend to be the first ones people let slip when they struggle to manage stress. Aiello also encourages people to find something they enjoy and pursue it, but be selective.
“A lot of students will say to me, ‘I really enjoy scrolling on my phone and zoning out, and I don’t have to feel the stress.’ And I say, ‘OK, but how do you feel after that?’ Oftentimes, an event or an activity is going to be the better option. It’s the difference between numbing the stress or actually relieving the stress,” Aiello said.
When overwhelmed, you may think you have no time to do the things you enjoy. Aiello suggests filling the “dead time” that exists in your day. Maybe listen to your favorite music on the walk to class, or call a loved one on the way to work.
“There’s a misconception about stress management that you have to set aside big chunks of time to take care of yourself,” Aiello said. “In reality, smaller increments are more effective because it gives you more opportunities to check in on yourself.”
A certain amount of eustress is “optimal” to keep people motivated. Taking a couple of moments for yourself a few times a day can keep you in the optimal zone.
Create a bedtime routine
An overactive mind won’t help you rest. Aiello encourages creating a bedtime routine, like taking a warm shower or engaging in a relaxing hobby, to signal to your brain to wind down.
“It’s important to take the things that are in your brain and put them somewhere else for the night,” Aiello said.
That can be as simple as making a list of the three most important things you need to do the next day or two.
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