Tech gifts are high on the wish list for many teenagers this holiday season, but adults have legitimate concerns about teens’ use of technology.
UVA youth development expert Nancy Deutsch says communicating and listening as well as setting an example can help families win influence with their teens’ technology use. (University Communications photo)
Whether it is a new smartphone or access to new social media apps, families can help teens build healthy habits and support their well-being as they expand their use of technology, said Nancy Deutsch, the Linda K. Bunker Professor of Education at the University of Virginia’s School of Education and Human Development.
Deutsch directs the Youth-Nex research center and co-directs UVA’s Thriving Youth in a Digital Environment initiative. She often shares guidance for youth and caregivers about social media’s impact on teens and how to help youth thrive in a digital world.
If your teen is expanding their digital access this season, it might be a great time to revisit these five tips from Deutsch:
- Establish open communication: Open communication is a great starting point. Teens use digital technologies to meet their developmental needs, so understanding those needs is a necessary first step. You likely met those same needs in other ways when you were a teen. Remember jumping on the old landline to talk to your friends after school? Plus, you likely use technology to meet some of your current needs. So, talk about how you both are using technology and consider forming healthy habits together.
- Listen to teens: Talk with teens about their experiences. We often assume teens only see the positives of technology, but they are also aware of when it can be a problem. Talking about the good, the bad and the in-between with them, rather than just focusing on the negatives or on limits you want to impose, will involve them in making decisions. The ideas they have for making technology a healthy, rather than all-encompassing, part of their lives may surprise you.
- Identify goals of social media: Help young people identify goals in social media use and help them set reasonable limits. By talking to teens about what they see as the benefits of social media, as well as the negatives – which teens can and do recognize – you can develop rules together that help them meet their positive goals and put guardrails on the risks.
- Be a role model: Never underestimate the power of role modeling. If you don’t want your teen on their phone at the dinner table, then you can’t have your phone at the dinner table. Be aware of how, when and why you use different technologies, and be open about that with your teen.
- Explore resources: The Center for Parent and Teen Communication, run by the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, is a great resource for talking with teens about a variety of topics, including social media and mental health. Common Sense Media also has an education section, which includes tools and resources for families to help youth navigate digital technology and social media.
